Night reading · Psalm 4:8
I will both lay me down in peace
Praying Psalm 4 and Psalm 3 into sleep
I will both lay me down in peace, and sleep: for thou, LORD, only makest me dwell in safety.
Psalm 4:8 · King James Version
This one is not a story. It is two short psalms, slowly, as a way of putting the day down.
David wrote the first of them while running from his own son. Absalom had taken the kingdom, and half the country had gone over, and the king was walking out of his own city barefoot and weeping. If anybody ever had a right to lie awake, it was that night.
Listen to what he writes.
LORD, how are they increased that trouble me! many are they that rise up against me.
He starts by saying the true thing. He does not open with praise he does not feel. He names the trouble, and he names how many.
But thou, O LORD, art a shield for me; my glory, and the lifter up of mine head.
The lifter up of mine head. Say that one twice. When your head is down — from shame, from grief, from simple exhaustion — He is the one who lifts it. You do not lift it yourself.
I cried unto the LORD with my voice, and he heard me out of his holy hill.
And then, the sentence:
I laid me down and slept; I awaked; for the LORD sustained me.
Four things, in order. I lay down. I slept. I woke up. Because He held me the whole time I was not holding anything.
I will not be afraid of ten thousands of people, that have set themselves against me round about.
Now the second one, Psalm 4, which is the evening prayer of the church and has been for two thousand years.
Hear me when I call, O God of my righteousness: thou hast enlarged me when I was in distress; have mercy upon me, and hear my prayer.
Stand in awe, and sin not: commune with your own heart upon your bed, and be still.
Commune with your own heart upon your bed, and be still. That is permission for exactly what you are doing right now.
Thou hast put gladness in my heart, more than in the time that their corn and their wine increased.
More than harvest. More than a good year. More than the thing you were hoping would fix it.
And then the last verse, which you can take with you over the edge into sleep. Say it slowly. Say it more than once.
I will both lay me down in peace, and sleep:
for thou, LORD, only makest me dwell in safety.
Only Thou. Not the lock on the door. Not the balance in the account. Not the outcome you are waiting for.
Lay it down.
Sleep.