Answers
I feel hopeless and I do not want to go on.
Please tell a real person today — a doctor, a crisis line in your country, a pastor, a friend who will sit with you. That is not a lack of faith; it is obedience to the God who sent an angel to Elijah with food and sleep before He sent him a single word of correction. Scripture is full of believers who said they had had enough of life, and God did not despise one of them. You are not a burden, and this feeling is not a reliable narrator of your future.
Go and see for yourself
But he himself went a day's journey into the wilderness, and came and sat down under a juniper tree: and he requested for himself that he might die; and said, It is enough; now, O LORD, take away my life; for I am not better than my fathers.
1 Kings 19:4
Why art thou cast down, O my soul? and why art thou disquieted within me? hope thou in God: for I shall yet praise him, who is the health of my countenance, and my God.
Psalm 42:11
We are troubled on every side, yet not distressed; we are perplexed, but not in despair;
2 Corinthians 4:8